I talk a lot about peace, love, making peace, being love, etc. Well, because I am who I am, I find it necessary to act from time to time, instead of just talk. In that spirit, I'd like to offer some self-realized guidance on one way to bring about reconciliation...

I have a habit of saying just about anything :O

I also say things that are not completely understood, whether it be the actual words or the thinking behind the words. Whenever this occurs, I am provided the opportunity to put my peace-talk into action. I once had a dear friend say, "Jeff, you can't just say anything you want." I agree.

At the same time, passion causes me to lose sight of this when I get cranked up. I want the world to stop and listen. Rather narcissistic, huh? I agree again. So when I get foot-in-mouth dis-ease, I have the perfect remedy. I say, "I'm sorry." I don't mean just saying the words... I mean meaning the words. My method goes something like this -- "I'm sure that what I said was inappropriate, and I think it may have hurt you. I want you to know that I am sorry, and I will not do that again. Can you forgive me?"

Sort of elementary, you might say, but is it? Have you ever been in a position where you have a genuinely specific opportunity to make peace with someone you love, even if it means modifying the way you express yourself? When you've been around the block as many times as I have, and when you really, truly love people, AND when you are as outspoken as I am, there will inevitably come a time when you are confronted with the choice of either not budging or allowing the feelings of the one you love to take precedence over your need to make a point. Does that even make sense? I hope it does.

This post, like all the others I write, is very personal. I am growing as I am writing. You, Dear Reader, have an open window through which you may observe the evolution of Jeff Baker. I do not pretend to be right, I just speak my mind. I never intend to offend, and I seldom consider what one might glean from my posts, although there are times when I get carried away and unintentionally hurt another's feelings. Kind of like a bully pulpit, I tell it like I see it. But I am anything but a bully. I am a gentle soul with the best of intentions. I have friends who are hurting and I take it upon myself to defend, and much to my dismay, I can come across as offensive.

If you are reading my stuff and you know me, and if you have been offended by anything I have EVER written, I am sorry. I did not mean to hurt you. I cannot justify anything. I will not attempt to do so. I hope you can forgive me.

In closing this confessory entry, I'd like to add, for what it's worth, that I have even pulled some older posts as a means of backing up these heartfelt words. As much as I'd like to think that my blogging is mine alone, I recognize that (and it stings a little to write this but) I can't just say anything I want.

This is a shared world, and during uncertain times like these, it is imperative that each of us do all we can to give peace a chance to flourish. It has the potential to eliminate all of the ugliness that we have witnessed in recent times.

Peace for our lives, love for everyone, and thoughts that lead to reconciliation for us all. -- jb


  1. it only means you are who you are...some says, it's hard to say "I'm sorry" but if we just humble ourselves and let not pride overrule, it is not as difficult as we think it is.

  2. Peace for our lives, love for everyone, and thoughts that lead to reconciliation for us all.

    That's a message that I would sincerely like the right wing religious coalition against same sex marriages in California and elsewhere to hear. IMO the hypocrisy, outright lies, hatred and homophobia that they have exhibited is quickly closing and padlocking the door to reconciliation.

  3. My Dear Jeff:
    I'm not sure I agree. I believe we always have the right say what we want to say. However, I do think we have a responsibility to choose carefully HOW we say things - respect and loving kindness and non-judgment are the tests I try to apply to what I say. As always, a thought provoking post.

  4. Jeff,
    I would have to say if they know you they know your heart and that what you say may not always be what others want to hear, your heart is always in the right place. I have never felt anything but acceptance from you and never felt judgement come from you.

  5. thanks anonymous. I have been away and just found this comment as I was attempting to formulate a post...I need to wtite:)

    I have to say you lifted my spirits very much at a time when it was really needed.


Have any thoughts on this post? I'd really love to hear from you. Be Peace, Make Peace -- jb